once i start...

a project i  have a horrible time stopping.  I "started" to paint the kitchen the other day...and I seriously refuse to stop until its done.  I can be my own worst enemy.  I worked yesterday for HOURS and it still isn't done, but it's getting close.  Pics to come! however, I know that is one of my "things".  I drive to get it done and hate leaving things unfinished, but sometimes that infringes on other responsibilities and simple family/friend time.   I feel bad, because I did say no to something yesterday with a girlfriend when I think I should have said yes. But, I was so determined to keep working, I stayed where I was and painted.
I don't like that I did that, I like it when relationships come first.  So, today, more relationships, less painting....:)

Lent Lists

I told my friend I needed everyone who was participating in Lent to provide me with a list of their "do's and don'ts." only cuz I was having problems keeping up with who was doing what until when!  I didn't to cook offer or go anywhere that would infringe upon Lent decisions :)
It was done in jest, but seriously - next time..I need lists!
Anyway, though I chose not to participate, I am in full respect of those that do. I went through something similar in January - though it was not an official Lent of sorts.
However, I do sincerely pray whatever your Lent entailed...that it brought you close to the Lord.  I did pray because that the "limitations" made for Lent by the people around me are for that reason only.  I overheard someone at the supermarket say they were giving up carbs for Lent..."just to see if they could do it." hmmm, might be missing the point there.

not sure what to "title" it...

before reality knocks, my dream can live a few seconds more
a beautiful world breathes before it's suffocated by my defenses
and for just a little while i can refuse to lock down my senses

there is a pause between moments
where nothing makes sense
but somewhere stories unfold
and no one has written the ending

wings let me fly
before gravity grounds my feet
everything is just a vapor to the touch
if my eyes open, it will disappear

misty thoughts and plausible impossibility
it ebbs and flows as moments of conscience
slip back and forth into the unconscious

eyes flutter open to find clarity
emotions plummet and rise
trying to find stability where dreams and reality clash

it's gone as feet touch solid ground
eyes focus on what is real
common sense dowsing imaginations fire

I close my eyes, but it's gone with the awakened
my skin feels the residue of what my mind can't remember
my soul still quakes at the hazy memory

my heart still knows where it's been
even if my thoughts can't recall the journey
my reality sharpens, the walls can be built to keep me sensible

until the walls fall apart in slumber
until my reality escapes
until the dreams return
until i close my eyes again.

Pictures and Love (146)

I talked to a few people last night and I think I am all set.  As I book clients, run a few promos and market for the potential of my young business I knew I wanted it to be more than just a business.  Of course I wanted it to be fueled by a passion for what I do and who I do it for...but I wanted a little more ;)
So, in the contests and bookings I still have ahead, there will be a percentage I make going toward LOVE146.  I encourage you to take the time to read and digest what it is all about.
However, in case you don't click on the link, it is an organization to stop child sex trafficking and the sexual exploitation of children.  It is more of a problem then you or I would like to really admit.
I have the support of my church at Bethlehem Community Church where we support LOVE146 as well as some other key people involved in it's organization and founding, so I am excited.
It's ironic...it's sad that an organization like this has to even exist, but it's empowering to think, that we can all do a small part to help fund it.
Oddly enough, I was never a big "cause" person.  Sounds a little crass I know. But, everyone has an agenda and a cause and I kinda brushed them off a little and was a little narcissistic in my thoughts...like how much does it really help to run a 5k for something?  But, that has changed. Where there is passion, there is possibility.
So, passion, photography and Love146.
The current child contest and it's link and can be found here.

Thanks so much if you spread the word,  anyone can repost the link. I certainly won't mind! :) :) :)

Passionate Photography and Vampires..say wha?

Ok, so my mind wanders from time to time. Last night, a fellow photog invited me to watch a photography webinar with by Jesh de Rox about his business philosophy called Beloved...The Beloved Collective.  His one hour session was intriguing as he showed his basis for doing anything is...relationships.  Makes sense right? He talked about what our culture had embraced through the past few decades...the "walmart generation" where it's less personal, but you find mass produced "cheaper" items. Romantic huh?

Serious thought: We (artist, photographers, coaches, teachers, ANYONE) may need to focus on a more relational approach, a more passionate approach...where people and who they are, are the motivation and the cornerstone to whatever you do.

Wandering thought: As I was introduced to Jesh de Rox for the first time, I kinda thought he looked like a Cullen...not so much Edward...but a Cullen all the same.

Serious thought: Why was Twilight successful? There are bazillion blogs and ideas behind that.  But it had the key elements...passion, relationships, suspension of disbelief and overcoming impossible odds. Sound familiar?

Wandering thought: What if Jesh actually referred to the movie in his webinar?  "Photography is a passion for people, like vampires, we seek to extract from deep inside our clients" Maybe not..  I mean, Jesh is a vegetarian...so are the Cullens!

Serious thought: Whether it be photography or whatever else, if a passion for people intercepts the crossroad of business, responsibilities and life in general, I think we would find ourselves blessed over and over again.  It's hard to open up your heart to others who may reject it or accept it, but as with anything...maybe love really can conquer all :)

Wandering Thought: If love can conquer vampire loving human...  hmm...i think love CAN conquer all :)

Serious Thought: the thoughts and ideas challenged me to be a better photographer...passionate about the people AND the business.  I look forward to the relationships I am building every day. I have fallen in love with what I do and the people and the moments we capture together.

Wandering Thought:  People are truly beautiful and who wouldn't want a picture of that? If there were vampires out there wanting a family portrait.....i'm in.

Monster Jam and such...

I never thought...NEVER thought I would be at an event such as Monster Jam.  In fact, I didn't even know what it was until last spring.  My kids stumbled up on it when flipping channels and it was love at first sight.
It has grown in popularity and finally shows have come to the northeast...to which we have attended two "jams"and just bought tickets to an event this summer.  We have endured some teasing from friends...as if we should all be wearing wife beaters, greasy hair and tattoos to be considered among the regulars.  However, I have to say, it is quite the opposite.  Unlike anything I expected, most of these events are absent of the "redneckers" and more family oriented..kids, families and lots of big trucks.  I had to giggle to myself when I realized at this last event, I knew every driver...and every truck.  It's kind of like college basketball...I know all about it because I almost have no choice!  So, I can hold any water cooler conversation about either sport.
The whole idea brings me to the fact that watching my kiddos faces light up is the entire reason I would sit through big trucks flipping around and paying too much for cotton candy so we can get the souvenir.  It's something special they have developed a passion for and seeing it through their eyes makes me understand it a little better.
Must be how God feels about us.  He takes great joy in seeing our faces light up in the blessings he is willing to bestow...kinda neat that our love for children doesn't even compare to how He feels about us.

Self-promotion...IDK

Ok, so I am so excited about running my own photography biz and I am taking my learning "bumps" as I go.  However, besides organizing orders and bills, I think my least fave part is self-promotion.  I know that might seem contradictory to my nature as a human being, but big difference between outgoing and friendly and promoting myself. Ugh, I even admit it's hard for to me post stuff on facebook to get traffic to what I am doing! This week I was working on a bunch of stuff and I would get a small knot in my stomach when I present something to a business or school.
I was comforted slightly when I saw a business article about marketing for women and men.  The difference...men to really like promoting themselves..ha! not sure how true that is, but women seem to have a hard time.  I can't find the article again or else I would post it, but it was funny.
 I am still working on being a better photographer, but man, telling everyone they should use me...it's like a whirlwind of...not wanting to. wanting to. not wanting to. have to. do i really have to?. yes. ugh. fine.
yup. wish people would just somehow know I exist..ha!  guess it doesn't work like that ;)