Close my eyes

I close my eyes and clamp my hands over my ears and refuse to listen.  Ok, maybe not literally, but I think if i were to sum up my emotions sometimes...that is what I am doing.  For some reason, this week and last week a bunch of not so good news has come rolling in.  Friends fighting cancer, others unable to conceive a baby and giving up, relapses in sickness, finding out friends my age have had parents pass away - all in a short amount of time.  It's kinda overwhelming to take it all in. Sometimes ( and I admit) I can barely make myself pray - because it is emotionally exhausting to go there...I would rather close my eyes, clamps my ears, shake my head and cry out "I can't hear you!"  Tis true. But, I find myself also encouraged in many things.  In this book my Max Lucado "It's Not About Me" the last line of the second chapter is in regard to Max at 9 years old going to his first funeral. It is the first time he sees his uncle's dead body, his usually happy aunts crying, his other uncles stoic and his father somber.   It leads to this awesome passage :
"It's ok son," he assures, laying his hand on my leg. Somehow I know it is. Why it is, I don't know. My family still wails. Uncle Buck is still dead, but if Dad, in the midst of it all says it's okay, then that's enough. At that moment I realized something. I could look around and find fear, or look at my father and find faith. I chose  my father's face, so did Moses. So can you."
Open eyes. Unclamp ears. Breathe.