Thursday, March 31, 2011

once i start...

a project i  have a horrible time stopping.  I "started" to paint the kitchen the other day...and I seriously refuse to stop until its done.  I can be my own worst enemy.  I worked yesterday for HOURS and it still isn't done, but it's getting close.  Pics to come! however, I know that is one of my "things".  I drive to get it done and hate leaving things unfinished, but sometimes that infringes on other responsibilities and simple family/friend time.   I feel bad, because I did say no to something yesterday with a girlfriend when I think I should have said yes. But, I was so determined to keep working, I stayed where I was and painted.
I don't like that I did that, I like it when relationships come first.  So, today, more relationships, less painting....:)

Lent Lists

I told my friend I needed everyone who was participating in Lent to provide me with a list of their "do's and don'ts." only cuz I was having problems keeping up with who was doing what until when!  I didn't to cook offer or go anywhere that would infringe upon Lent decisions :)
It was done in jest, but seriously - next time..I need lists!
Anyway, though I chose not to participate, I am in full respect of those that do. I went through something similar in January - though it was not an official Lent of sorts.
However, I do sincerely pray whatever your Lent entailed...that it brought you close to the Lord.  I did pray because that the "limitations" made for Lent by the people around me are for that reason only.  I overheard someone at the supermarket say they were giving up carbs for Lent..."just to see if they could do it." hmmm, might be missing the point there.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

not sure what to "title" it...

before reality knocks, my dream can live a few seconds more
a beautiful world breathes before it's suffocated by my defenses
and for just a little while i can refuse to lock down my senses

there is a pause between moments
where nothing makes sense
but somewhere stories unfold
and no one has written the ending

wings let me fly
before gravity grounds my feet
everything is just a vapor to the touch
if my eyes open, it will disappear

misty thoughts and plausible impossibility
it ebbs and flows as moments of conscience
slip back and forth into the unconscious

eyes flutter open to find clarity
emotions plummet and rise
trying to find stability where dreams and reality clash

it's gone as feet touch solid ground
eyes focus on what is real
common sense dowsing imaginations fire

I close my eyes, but it's gone with the awakened
my skin feels the residue of what my mind can't remember
my soul still quakes at the hazy memory

my heart still knows where it's been
even if my thoughts can't recall the journey
my reality sharpens, the walls can be built to keep me sensible

until the walls fall apart in slumber
until my reality escapes
until the dreams return
until i close my eyes again.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Pictures and Love (146)

I talked to a few people last night and I think I am all set.  As I book clients, run a few promos and market for the potential of my young business I knew I wanted it to be more than just a business.  Of course I wanted it to be fueled by a passion for what I do and who I do it for...but I wanted a little more ;)
So, in the contests and bookings I still have ahead, there will be a percentage I make going toward LOVE146.  I encourage you to take the time to read and digest what it is all about.
However, in case you don't click on the link, it is an organization to stop child sex trafficking and the sexual exploitation of children.  It is more of a problem then you or I would like to really admit.
I have the support of my church at Bethlehem Community Church where we support LOVE146 as well as some other key people involved in it's organization and founding, so I am excited.
It's ironic...it's sad that an organization like this has to even exist, but it's empowering to think, that we can all do a small part to help fund it.
Oddly enough, I was never a big "cause" person.  Sounds a little crass I know. But, everyone has an agenda and a cause and I kinda brushed them off a little and was a little narcissistic in my thoughts...like how much does it really help to run a 5k for something?  But, that has changed. Where there is passion, there is possibility.
So, passion, photography and Love146.
The current child contest and it's link and can be found here.

Thanks so much if you spread the word,  anyone can repost the link. I certainly won't mind! :) :) :)

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Passionate Photography and Vampires..say wha?

Ok, so my mind wanders from time to time. Last night, a fellow photog invited me to watch a photography webinar with by Jesh de Rox about his business philosophy called Beloved...The Beloved Collective.  His one hour session was intriguing as he showed his basis for doing anything is...relationships.  Makes sense right? He talked about what our culture had embraced through the past few decades...the "walmart generation" where it's less personal, but you find mass produced "cheaper" items. Romantic huh?

Serious thought: We (artist, photographers, coaches, teachers, ANYONE) may need to focus on a more relational approach, a more passionate approach...where people and who they are, are the motivation and the cornerstone to whatever you do.

Wandering thought: As I was introduced to Jesh de Rox for the first time, I kinda thought he looked like a Cullen...not so much Edward...but a Cullen all the same.

Serious thought: Why was Twilight successful? There are bazillion blogs and ideas behind that.  But it had the key elements...passion, relationships, suspension of disbelief and overcoming impossible odds. Sound familiar?

Wandering thought: What if Jesh actually referred to the movie in his webinar?  "Photography is a passion for people, like vampires, we seek to extract from deep inside our clients" Maybe not..  I mean, Jesh is a vegetarian...so are the Cullens!

Serious thought: Whether it be photography or whatever else, if a passion for people intercepts the crossroad of business, responsibilities and life in general, I think we would find ourselves blessed over and over again.  It's hard to open up your heart to others who may reject it or accept it, but as with anything...maybe love really can conquer all :)

Wandering Thought: If love can conquer vampire loving human...  hmm...i think love CAN conquer all :)

Serious Thought: the thoughts and ideas challenged me to be a better photographer...passionate about the people AND the business.  I look forward to the relationships I am building every day. I have fallen in love with what I do and the people and the moments we capture together.

Wandering Thought:  People are truly beautiful and who wouldn't want a picture of that? If there were vampires out there wanting a family portrait.....i'm in.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Monster Jam and such...

I never thought...NEVER thought I would be at an event such as Monster Jam.  In fact, I didn't even know what it was until last spring.  My kids stumbled up on it when flipping channels and it was love at first sight.
It has grown in popularity and finally shows have come to the northeast...to which we have attended two "jams"and just bought tickets to an event this summer.  We have endured some teasing from friends...as if we should all be wearing wife beaters, greasy hair and tattoos to be considered among the regulars.  However, I have to say, it is quite the opposite.  Unlike anything I expected, most of these events are absent of the "redneckers" and more family oriented..kids, families and lots of big trucks.  I had to giggle to myself when I realized at this last event, I knew every driver...and every truck.  It's kind of like college basketball...I know all about it because I almost have no choice!  So, I can hold any water cooler conversation about either sport.
The whole idea brings me to the fact that watching my kiddos faces light up is the entire reason I would sit through big trucks flipping around and paying too much for cotton candy so we can get the souvenir.  It's something special they have developed a passion for and seeing it through their eyes makes me understand it a little better.
Must be how God feels about us.  He takes great joy in seeing our faces light up in the blessings he is willing to bestow...kinda neat that our love for children doesn't even compare to how He feels about us.

Self-promotion...IDK

Ok, so I am so excited about running my own photography biz and I am taking my learning "bumps" as I go.  However, besides organizing orders and bills, I think my least fave part is self-promotion.  I know that might seem contradictory to my nature as a human being, but big difference between outgoing and friendly and promoting myself. Ugh, I even admit it's hard for to me post stuff on facebook to get traffic to what I am doing! This week I was working on a bunch of stuff and I would get a small knot in my stomach when I present something to a business or school.
I was comforted slightly when I saw a business article about marketing for women and men.  The difference...men to really like promoting themselves..ha! not sure how true that is, but women seem to have a hard time.  I can't find the article again or else I would post it, but it was funny.
 I am still working on being a better photographer, but man, telling everyone they should use me...it's like a whirlwind of...not wanting to. wanting to. not wanting to. have to. do i really have to?. yes. ugh. fine.
yup. wish people would just somehow know I exist..ha!  guess it doesn't work like that ;)

Monday, March 14, 2011

Ya know when just one line hits ya...

Sometimes I'll be reading right along and then wham...something hits me for one reason or another.
Right now I am reading Beth Moore's "Believing God" suggested by my awesome sister-in-law.  There are a number of reason's I am reading it..but the opening quote today was:
"Faith is the only thing that will ever close the gap between our theology and our reality."

I try to picture the two moving closer together..theology in one hand...reality in another..and your faith moves them so close..that eventually- they are holding hands...walking in the same direction! :)

Friday, March 11, 2011

small town diners...

might just have the best coffee. I might be going against the grain, might be destroying all hope for coffee supremacy, might suffer the wayward darts of coffee snubbery (not sure if that is a word) - BUT...I have been to two local cafe's this week...and neither one of them has Dunkin... or "bux" in their name and I have to say. yummo.
I shall go back. I shall drink more coffee and I shall be very happy. Coffee...good...price...even better. Actually, two coffees and a small breakfast cost AS MUCH as ONE peppermint mocha (my favorite) at the place with "bux" in it's name.
Don't get me wrong...there is always a love for those big names and their coffees..puhleeze! I'm a fan! Just saying, those lil guys...well they get it right too :)

Thursday, March 10, 2011

I'll say it every year...

Where did the past year go?? Mah baby is five.  So, he's kinda not a baby.  OF COURSE we looked through baby pics (and goodness knows I take a bunch) and it's fascinating to see the changes.  Before Austin was born, three of us were pregnant all at the same time...and YUP..I was the LAST of the three.  Two friends with their amazing new babies before March ever appeared on the calendar, I was huge, he decided to be a week late.
It's amazing that time really does fly and all three of those amazing babies all turned five in the past six weeks.  It's hard not to be thankful for their health, their smiles and their overall amazing life journey so far.
It's amusing how different their life perspective is..I mean in five more years --- they will ALL be ten! (and their older siblings will be pre-teens! ugh)
Phrases that kill me from my kids:
"Way back in the 90's did you...."
"They had color tv when you were a kid??"
"I think she was way older than you mom..like 30 or something"
So many more..but I will try not to depress myself!
Today, we get to celebrate and I am sure I'll have plenty of "mom" moments and I'll probably say stuff like..
"Five years ago today..." haha

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

intentionally being intentional

Deep title huh? Sometimes, more often than not, actions have to be intentional or else an entire day, week or month can go buy unaltered with things that "should have" been done or said.  Intentionally being kind, intentionally investing in someone, intentionally getting work done or intentionally setting aside time to pray or be alone.  It would seem easy to pull those things off, but when everyday unfolds and everyday our own lives wrap us up in our own little cocoon it can be more of a challenge than originally thought.
I can definitely slip off into my world and the rest of everyone passes by.  This can totally be true if I'm working on a writing project or reading or simply just feeling like I need time away from everyone :)  Those things are all GOOD! Don't get me wrong, but those things need less "intention" from me...that all comes super easy :).  BUT, especially after a few challenges from our small group in Bethlehem..it's easy to see where we fall short of investing in others, loving others and intentionally finding ways to do so.
I have a few goals in my mind...
and no I'm not going to start a Jane Austen book club...well.... I'll never say never ;)

Monday, March 7, 2011

quote of the day..

"I admire your enthusiasm, I question your intelligence..."  haha, yup. this could just summarize SO MANY things :)

Friday, March 4, 2011

book clubs and slacker blogging...

Kinda of a blogging slacker :) I have nothing profound to share or whimsical words to create...well at least not right this moment. So many things sometimes going on at once I just don't know where to start or what to pick from to write about..thus I got nothing!
however, I did watch the Jane Austen book club finally. AND..I liked it. There were a few things the movie could have done without...but overall it was worth watching and since I have only read through two of Jane's books, reading all six in a book club would be daunting...but perhaps I could be drawn in by the cute coffee shops and great food.  Then I had to wonder...I don't know if I could actually find SIX people that would meet once a month for nothing more than to talk about books.  I think I could find six people that would WANT to, but six people that actually could notch that out in their schedule...I am hesitant to say that's a possibility.  Much more...they would actually have to have time to read the books!
THAT leads me to my next thought.  Everyone's schedules seem so crazy, mine included.  So, I have to wonder...if we really don't have time to read a book or simply meet together with loved ones and friends...what's our schedule really worth?  Mine has gotten some revamping ...